The Lights Go On and Off

By the time I wake up these days, the lamp in the living room is turned on. Chip purchased Wyze smart bulbs associated with an app (he got a special deal for the bulbs…he loved a good deal!) and he used the app to set both lamps in the living room to turn on at 6am and to turn off at 7:30am. When the sun rose later in the mornings than it does now, we used to like staying in bed until after 6 so that we could descend into the lighted living room (Why have to bend over and turn the knob on the lamp if we don’t need to, he’d say). One of the lamps isn’t working correctly on the timer (contacting Wyze is on my to-do list), so I sit close to the one that works and think of him while it burns and when it goes off. The smart bulbs always seemed a bit unnecessary to me, and I’m not sure what it was about them that he liked best. Some mornings, I tell myself Chip put the timers on the lamps so that, when the eventual happened, he could make my life easier even if he weren’t physically present to do so (He always looked for ways to make my life easier when he was alive). Other mornings, I imagine him thinking from The Beyond that the turning on and off of these lamps on their own is him sending his energy and love to me via earthly objects.

Sometimes I think the lamps go on and off simply for the reason that Chip liked technology and that his purchase of the smart bulbs had everything to do with his love of new and different technology. A SONDORS electric bike that he bought on Kickstarter 5 or so years ago (he was part of the original loyal supporters who backed SONDORS, dubbed as “the most affordable eBike ever”…again with the deal-finding theme in Chip’s life!). Electrical sockets controlled by an app called Gosund. Several Alexas around the house (We’d joke frequently that she was always listening…and we both knew full well that she was). Maybe his strong interest stemmed from his years working in the telecom industry? Maybe it was because he received constant emails from CNET and Cheapskate, which tempted him to purchase the newest and most exciting modern products? Often, I think he just loved “the hunt” for something new and different and, when something really caught his eye, he went for it without a second thought. I’ll never know for sure what motivated him the most, but “going for the gusto” was definitely part of the way he lived his life, so I tend to think it was the latter.

From what I knew of him, second-guessing himself or his decisions was not something he did often. When I referenced this quality of him to his sister Carolyn shortly after his death, she reported to me that Chip would say “Go for the gusto, or go away!” We laughed and agreed this was a mantra, of sorts, for Chip. When I told Chip’s friend Bob about my conversation with Carolyn, he informed me that Chip’s saying was his take on Schlitz beer ads in the 1970’s that said “Go for the gusto or don’t go at all.” Being 6 years younger than him, I was too young to remember the radio and tv ads, so I looked them up online. After watching many of them, I think these here, here and here were the 3 that might have resonated most with him (or influenced him), since family and friends, self-reliance, the American West, scuba-diving, and discovery were all so important to him.

The light in the living room has gone off. That’s my cue to face another day…without him.